Paul J Penton – Songwriter

Irish Murphys

Clever name that
Irish Murphys
another ‘Irish impersonator’ pub
with Guinness on tap
and a band playing in the corner with a fiddle
but no
tonight it’s Nirvana meets Hudu Gurus
3 piece unit
drums
bass
guitar
they start playing in the corner
through an aching stack of speakers
I’m impressed
such a big sound from such a little group
there’s something about his guitar tone I like
it’s a Gibson SG
you know
the ‘Angus’ guitar
with some sort of effect
like a flange or a chorus
for thickening
a meaty solid sound
so when we hear the riff for
Smells like Teen spirit
no adjustments are necessary
he can’t sing well
but he sings enough
the drums and bass are friends
matched in gridlock
clock time
lockstep
TIGHT!
Again I’m impressed
that’s hard to do
it’s getting louder
as some bloke with bearish shoulders
who seems to have just come from the gym
enters the pub
He starts shaking the hands of everybody
he’s got no boundary
doesn’t see trouble coming
but he doesn’t seem dangerous
-just a threat
I’m a little scared and ignore him
as he comes by
shaking my hand without invitation
the music gets louder
my ears begin to ring
before they begin to ring
‘just one more song’
I mouth above the raging wash
she agrees
the one more song
turns into an epic
like something from a mid seventies theme album
it goes on and on ‘with various segments
all clever and interesting
the singer had said
“let’s forget all this normal old shit let’s rock out”
so this is rocking out
a heavy contrast to the world of the casino across the road…

BOMBSHELL

She hangs next to the bar
suspended magically in thin air
in a white dress with thin straps
running down along her breasts
her hem coming up
just below her arse
her well formed gym fit arse
follow down those legs
those brown creamy legs
those schoolboy fantasy legs
a hundred mens eyes are focused
all the way down
to a pair of arching calves
and medium high heels,
not ridiculous
she knows how far to push
she’s putting it all out there playfully
teasing young men coming to the bar
who ask for a photo of themselves with her
she leans back with a razor white macleans smile
the camera held at arms length
focsues and captures the moment
making them think
for a moment
there’s a glimmer of hope
that something extraordinary might happen
to this unordinary lives
She lets a hint more cleavage become exposed
revealing the black underwear
the next layer
the hidden world
the subject of late night fantasy later
the thing is
she knows it
she’s been playing this part for years
always plays to it
plays to the crowd
her long dyed black hair
her cavernous eyes
suck you in like a black hole
a whirlpool
a vortex
with the imaginings of what might be
all around her the rest of the faces and clothes seem a shade of faded grey
she shines
she’s the star
the galactic center of this show
and she knows it

the band comes on stage
playing top 40 hits
sounds like they’ve just learned the first couple of tunes
but then they step it up a gear
two female singers
bearing a cross of George
right across their breast
the blonde singer less experienced
she hasn’t got the moves
of the sassy one on the right
the one who’s had jazz ballet lessons
and models sporty spice
she throws her hand into space
at the appropriate moments
her finger making a pointing bone
to the galaxy of lights
she pouts her lips between lyrics
a real performer
just like our playboy bunny
but the singer seems more genuine
homely
she’s in the moment
and loving it
maybe the bombshell is too
there were a few fragments of conversation
overheard
from bombshell
there didn’t seem to be too much going on
intellectually
but I won’t make a judgement on that
I’m only speaking what I see and hear
the band moves into a rendition of
“oh what a night” followed by S.O.S.
ABBA
time to leave
they’re losing pace
white dress has moved off and merged in
with the rest of the casino crowd
we walk around
seeking her entertainment
the lights flash
serious faces stare down chips on the roulette table
casual hands wipe away offers from the dealer
at Carribean five card stud
I don’t get it
how to play those cards

The street

Walking back to the car
people hanging out on the street
spilling out of a restaurant
just had dinner
hugs and familial friendship taunts
names that only they know
inside the inner circle

a group of teenagers
one of them being goaded
dared
to enter ‘Sexyland’
what would he find in there?
rows of magazines
sex toys
DVD’s
rubberised underwear
Dildos
the illegality of it pushes his boundaries
pushes his buttons
releases a thousand imaginings of bombshell blondes
will he do it?
is he strong enough?
to carry through
there’s probably a camera
watching the whole episode
and as soon as he steps over the threshold
some disinterested attendant
will usher him out
unless he has proof of age

Cafes

a street where every taxi in the city is lined up
a row of cafes
and amusement arcades
people standing outside
smoking cigarettes
with hopes of getting laid
all laid out in their mind
what must be done next
to find someone to impress
piped music shrieks from tired speakers
electronic beeps are emitted
from amusement arcade machines
roaring engines
of the Daytona five hundred machine

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He works on the ferries
blue overalls and a friendly smile
“good luck mate’ he says
as we set sail
the ferry pulls away
rocking on Sydney Harbour
we sway under the bridge
bound for Darling Harbour
and Milsons point
the engines are vibrating
up through the hull
into the frame of the seat I’m sitting in
a celestial harmony of straining bearings
sing through the vessel
as we glide slowly with the waves
the harmonies abate as as the power is applied
the engines now are unharmonic voices
stuck in a drone
with the power down
the mumble of the motors
shakes the boat from side to side
rumbling as the power dies
as we glide
into Milsons Point
pointy triangle top waves
dance in green and grey

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A conversation on train

“the day I found out they were seeing each other”
“she’s so stupid”
“message was if I got to talk to her”
“oh my gosh”
“I expected you to be ‘this’ person”
“what the hell”
“blocked her, can’t see anything on my facebook”
“who is she, really”
“she stole my boyfriend”
“tempted to call and start bothering her”
“after the exams”
“2 weeks ago I didn’t know her”
“she didn’t get the message”
“”nothing she can do to me”
“what the hell?”
“she said I didn’t get your message, like yeah!”
“you need to calm”
“be blunt to me”
“Heath is like a ‘retard’”
“Talking to Amy about uni events”
“some uneducated people”
“so what, I’m over it”
“hey can you get out of my life”
“my god she’s such a bitch”
“yeah he’s with her, but he don’t love her”

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A girl on the train
in a school uniform
cheeks blushed red
hides in the corner
a Maori boy
is acting cool
she’s looking at him
you can tell she’s keen
maybe tonight
she’ll write about him
in her diary
confess her love
express her dreams.
Maybe by the end of the week
she might talk to him
bump into him
accidentally on purpose on the train
just like she planned to do last week

She’ll be cool
and offhand
just like her dreams
She doesn’t wear the clothes
like other girls
but she’s got something
if only he would notice her-
but she’s hiding in the corner
she thinks he might have
a tender heart
beneath his cool exterior

The boy carries on
acting for his mates
telling jokes
in a maroon jumper
He probably plays football
with those coat hanger shoulders
They hold up his frame

He doesn’t notice her
the shy one in the corner
every day on the train’
she longs to be noticed by him
longs
she chooses the carriage that he is in
to be next to him
hoping
he might notice

But the train just creeks and rattles
passers by jostle
to escape to the platform
it stops at every station
this train full of commuters and punters
on their way to work
dressed in corporate uniforms
lit by flickering fluros
closed in by beeping doors
that say “stand clear please”
“stand clear please”
but she can’t stand clear of him

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Morning-
it’s wet outside
7 am pickup
now I’m in a room that’s humming
with air conditioning
an ECG thing
a chest pain incident
means the nurse is whisked away

Catheterized
a tube attaches to my hand like a Cyborg
A string of people have come to visit
and fill in forms and
to make sure I’m warm and ready
for the procedure

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Pelicans soaring on thermals
I would never have considered it
circling on lazy wings
higher and higher
no flapping
these elephantine imaginings
simply soaring

momentum
it carries our lives in directions
that we otherwise wouldn’t have seen

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Central station & CBD

Pigeons and seagulls
a swarm of them eating something
thrown by passers by
it’s a living mass of individuals making a whole

A Chinese woman with a mole
out of proportion
the size of a finger nail

Westpac bank -George street
a CHUBB Security van
parked outside
A nervous security officer on standby
near the door
looking for trouble
a squat fat man
is hanging round
he drives the car
that precedes the van
it all has an air of suspicion

Hungry Jacks
A simple cup of tea
couldn’t understand a word
said by the serving girl
three repetitions
to understand what she means
the decor in here is ‘happy days’
lots of chrome and spangly seats in glittery silver
circa 1950

a Sleeping bag
and milk crates outside the
Sydney plaza center
is it an installation?
what might it mean?

three beggars on various corners
two just sitting
one moaning a bit
and then a guy with a shoe shine stand
just sitting on folded knees
almost Bhuddist
he’s got a sign

I am homeless – shoe-shine
struggling
please help me
I am having a go
if you would like to sponsor me
I would be helpful
I also polish briefcases
Jesus loves you

What if he packs up from here
goes to his high class apartment
takes off his wig
and becomes something else?

I donlt think so as he
He goes to the bin
to retrieve a cigarette butt discarded
the contrast is interesting
being here
in the heart of the financial district

the Commonwealth bank building
when it used to owned by the Commonwealth
a coat of arms
emblazoned above each doorway
Corinthian columns
sandstone

Martin place
A man with a trolley
of Australia post delivery boxes
pauses as some of them teeter off
dropping onto the pavement
he turns around to re-secure them
looks to be late fifties
is this all he’s ever done?
what is he looking forward to in his retirement?

I Follow a bloke on a mobile phone
“ended up on my arse three times”
three times he says
was he skiing I wonder?
Black suit with thick and thin grey lines
well clipped grey hair
a satchel under his arm

Curtin place
suited men having quick lunches
stockbroking lunch breaks
the eateries getting ready for lunch
making mountains of food
Mongolian chickens
Saskatchuan beef
ready for the lunchtime rush

Circular Quay

Looking to the opera house
Overcast
sun indistinct
as is the light
reflecting from the white sails
I’ve got a ringside seat
with my Rice paper rolls
and bottle of fizz
for ten bucks

there’s a round of Didgeridoo
with Duff Duff accompaniment
eating my lunch
with a choir of jealous seagulls
vying for my attention

what if….
I got back to the station
reached for my wallet
and it wasn’t there!
no money
no proof of who I am
credit cards hanging in the wind
how do you prove who you are?

Ettalong Motel

expansive water views
the fluorescent light in
the bathroom hums with a life of its own
metal plugs with a chain in the sink
the furniture circa ’68
as are the light fittings

A bar heater close to the roof
electrical cable frayed
no safety tag
so old it’s yellowed
with nicotine
and all the cigarette smoke
since 1960
a great companion for the helicopter
approaching from the distance
of the fluorescent bathroom light

Dinner at the pub
babbling voices
at the Ettalong Beach Hotel
a Whitesnake video
On the wide-screen LCD
Buffy hair
and backlit silhouettes
and stadium performances
and girls half dressed

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Avalon

A woman and child
he’s two to three
sitting directly behind me
at the terminal
asking lots of questions
as a child does
inane things
about the plane as it taxis in
about how tall the people are
to be able to get into the door
‘up so high’

she hugs him and snuggles
making me uncomfortable
why? He’s just a kid!
It’s natural to be that loving
it seems weird
’cause I know nothing of it
being affectionate
she’s so affectionate
I find it overwhelming,
threatening
but to her it’s normal

his name is Mohammed
now this I find unusual
he looks to me to be West Indian
his hairstyle Rastifarian
and she’s middle European
why name the kid Mohammed?
She wears no head scarf
what is the situation
between her and the father?

Airports

It always amazes me
how people manage to get there on time
to stand-by,
to get on a plane
and actually fly
there’s so many permutations and combinations
so many factors
that mean you might miss the flight
a traffic jam
a missing taxi
so many things
and some do.

But if you count
the two hundred fifty
maybe only one or two go missing
Sometimes they’re called out
in traffic announcements
‘If Mr XYZ is in the terminal
Please go to gate Y,
your plane is ready for immediate departure”

At the gates we sit
like restless cattle
filling up the moments
with sips from drink bottles
and vending machines
and small operations
that have a monoploy
on the corridors
every time we fly
there’s a new one
encroaching on the walkway
ready to burr your transit
with sandwhiches and drinks
and offers of wine

You stand in line
with the flimsy ticket
it flaps about as they try to scan it
then into the capsule
you’re locked down tight
if you’ve been clever you’ve reserved your seat
somewhere near the front
for a fast exit
with carry on baggage
where you walk down the stairs
to a different city atmosphere
walking on the apron
while the engines are humming
past those dormant silver stairs
that are still ringing
with the clumping feet
of other passengers
getting close to the exit door
as aviation fuel begins to fill the air.

Airport train

Stupidity
No return tickets for the city train
so – $14.70 one way
but no discount for loyalty!
14.70 the other!
Slipping down now
with the perambulations
of the escalator
and almost imperceptible whiz
glints of light reflect
on the silvered rails
from overhead lights

The announcements are clear
not too many echoes
what was it like during the blitz I wonder?
lumping about my 25 kilos
on back and pack
should I have weighed in first?

people with cases with wheels
make that hollow plastic sound
as they slip over the cracks in the tiles
7 more minutes and I’ll be under way
to circular quay,
via central

looking at those tall white sails
I’ll peruse the goings on
just another passenger
just another tourist
watching the ferries come and go
checking the waves
around three I’ll board
the Parramatta Cat
and go gliding over the harbour

CIRCULAR QUAY CAFE

Ferrys come and go
the Friendship, the Sirius
background music filters in
just the high frequencies
the hi hats and the guitars
a cappucino machine grinds beans
two girls to the right
talk about office politics
and things that matter to them
looks can be deceiving and
you know you’re the real deal
tea costs 3.50 your not paying for the tea
you’re paying for the infrastructure
your paying for the view the scenery

The Manly ferry – the Queenscliffe
the smell of the sea colours the air
Sydney harbour bridge
full of criss-cross lattices
caterpillars of people crossing the top
doing the bridge walk
the trill of the diesel’s in the air
as we slide across watery grey green
sun obscured behind clouds
a globe of white
past a private marina
I still don’t get how you build bridges in water
how you get the foundations
down so deep?
grey light smoke almost vertical
from a chiney
against a yellow washy sky

Parramatta

Sitting in the Port bar
Parramatta
A fellow with dark skin
a bit of a Mugabe
talks to a woman at the far end

the water from the Parramatta
tumbles over a breakwater
Later I learn it’s the spillway
between the fresh and the sea water
it also has a fish ladder, allowing them to climb
‘and dive in the briney side if they desire

The conversation is just out of reach
I want to lean my ears in closer
to see what these two are talking about
It has those rises and falls
that African way of speaking English
sounding educated
she doesn’t say much

some heavy clouds are advancing overhead
heavy doughnut clouds
it starts raining very hard
sitting on the edge of an awning
drops are pattering hard against the canvas
like when you’re camping
the rain flicking in harder and harder
moving back and back
retreating to stay dry
The plastic seats now have mercurial gatherings
pools of liquid that move like quicksilver

“So that’s where I’m at”
I overhear as they move closer
to shelter from the downpour
where might that be I wonder?
Is this a business meeting
I try to gauge the flow through his
black square rimmed glasses
“most of them are people”
“You got a head start”
Is she a consultant?
a celebrant?
why meet in this otherwise deserted cafe
near a ferry stop
maybe this is just the left-overs of a long lunch
and social networking

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June 3

On the streets

Shuffling the street
in old painters jeans
ragged beard
looking in bins
for cigarette butts
picking things off the ground
half smoked cigarette buts

gatherings of people
outside Flinders Street station
sitting on milk crates
with guitars
they seem happy

Train

A train at night
punching through a corridor of black
illuminated by white squares of office buildings
the illusion of movement
the way you seem to be moving
when another train beside you
is gliding away from the station

NANDOS

the kitchen alcove
rows of ticket orders
the staff talking to each other
getting it right above the
roar of the exhaust fans
three people on different stations
concentrating on different things
trying to make order out of chaos
in this busy lunchtime
I unwrap my package  a classic wrap
and let the Portugese peri peri
flame my tongue with delight

what you believe to be truths
I had to change two long life globes in the kitchen
energy efficient lamps
the truth as told is that these will last
five times longer than the others
the reality as experienced
is that these have not lasted any longer
than the standard filament bothers and sisters
so why pay 3 times the price
for something that doesn’t last as well?
It sort of reminds me that CD’s
were meant to be indestructible –
but as we all know
they have a life
scratches cause glitches
nothing IS perfect

Roadworks and traffic lights
all slowing me down tonight
…….I’m driving for your love
Hazyness in the valley
along Fertree Gully
looking European
the haze in the air

He’s got a Doctorate in Denial
and a wide angle smile
got a hard drive for a heart
women don’t know how to handle him
but don’t know where to start
women try to program him
but they don’t know where to start

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Dentist

Went to see Doctor Danny
about my teeth
why put it off?
almost been a year and a half
I was meant to see him this time last year
for my six monthly
but I got the call to remind me
and I was in Adelaide
and it just was never a priority
but something kept eating away at me
and I did it
and it was fine
just the standard scale and clean
that little drill that claws at the edges of your teeth
where they meet the gums
occasional spike s of sensation by way of pain
but purely temporary
assessment of no fillings
a rinse for a minute with the fluoride treatment
so I was free after 20 minutes
I enquired about teeth whitening
the $ 500 special
just for me
I’ll consider it

Chadstone

So ‘I’ve an hour and bit to fill
before the next appointment
and I drive to Chadstone
surely by now
it IS the largest shopping center
in the Southern Hemisphere
I get their and go in gateway 1 to find it’s blocked off
of course they’re doing more extensions
so I’m railroaded to an uppers storey car park
and take a few minutes to find a spot
maybe I should just give up
no
I’m on mission
lunch at my favorite chicken bar beckons
I descend some steps and drift through David Jones
through the welcoming sights and smells of the ladies cosmetics department
with beautiful painted ladies
displaying the best lipsticks and foundations
from their
chosen product lines
ready to explain
the benefits and disadvantages of one thing over another
and to make you a
‘one time only offer’

I make it through and hover on marbled floors
one storey up
transported across rows of apparel
looking down on the lower walkway
and all its tantalising offers
30% off today only!
etc
The escalator deposits me gracefully on the food court level
I walk through taking in the various smells of
Chinese and Italian
Japanese and Korean
it’s a world of food here
I see a man and woman in the midst of the tables
who look like they’re courting
or doing that thing that pigeons do
sort of cooing to each other in body language
I move straight through heading for the chicken bar
that I will not name
the one I wouldn’t mind to own If I had a spare 500 K

To keep aligned with my diet plan
I’m thinking it’s a salad to go with the chicken
but when I enquire about the price
I’m knocked back by the accountant inside
$13.50
for a chicken salad!
I can do better than that!
I storm back toward the food court
my outrage distilling and then disarmed
by playful kittens in the window at pets world
there’s three of them on the ground floor completely asleep legs stretched at ridiculous angles
soft grey stripey tummies
and serenity on their faces

I scan the food court looking for options
a chicken and avacado gets my attention
with orange juice I start to wolf ,
but then I get something crunchy in my teeth
a piece of unwashed spinach perhaps –
I let it pass
then another and another
should I take it back?
should I complain?
no I’ll just work around it
but maybe next time
I won’t be the nice guy
I’ll have changed

The clock gets close to two
so I leave for my next medical meeting

Cardiologist

Looking for consulting room fifty
down three or four sets of echoing corridors
and the trail runs dry,
backstep and realise I missed a turn
into a light filled corridor full of much older people
have I got he right place?
I check on the wall
a whole load of names
in Greek and Russian
and there’s my man.
I enter the reception area
I’m greeted by Amanda
who’s more than ‘there’
a stripey jungle pattern top
that sits on one shoulder
and the drops to the other
she’s constantly adjusting
I wonder if the other boy in the office
is getting turned on

I shuttle outside to fill in forms
name address and date of birth
next of kin etcetera etcetera
I leave them for her while I sit and listen
to a man on mobile who’s come out of the rooms
to talk to someone about his fathers disease
we hear him explaining about the bladder
‘if he doesn’t get it done
he could die as a soon as tomorrow
but the old man’s stubborn and doesn’t believe
doesn’t want to be seen inside a hospital
just like my old man
and here I now am in the grip of the machine
maybe it makes sense of those outrageous premiums

this fellow on the phone
he doesn’t realise he’s the entertainment
who magazines for June 2008 don’t compare with what we can hear
quite plainly form the other end of the corridor
all these old sick people
are tuning into his radio station
and I start to get lost in a cloud of concerns
over all the things
that have been happening
this tickling spider inside my heart
the elephant visits in the middle of the night
how they sit on my chest and constrict my breathing
and I can’t see that I’m doing anything different
to what I’ve always done
maybe now I’m on holiday
what I took to be stress
‘is manifesting
as some sort of disease
and it is
its’ dis- ease
An elderly lady comes out quickly
followed by stripey Amandal who mentions her surname
‘my ears prick up at the mention’
of it-the same as a former girlfriend
I surreptitiously peak
but the old woman doesn’t remind me of who I think she should be
and perhaps its the same with me
would she remember what I looked like from 1996?
She enters into conversation
with someone she knows
who’s just walked in a
nd I hear the name of ‘Nolene’
and ‘my other daughter’
the neo-natal nurse
and I know it’s her
my how our memory can play tricks
she’s nothing like
what popped into my imagination

My name is called out
and I meet the surgeon
he seems happy and relaxed
we transit to his office where a model heart is dead on the table
he explains the meaning of the suqiggly lines
on the E.C.G
and the operation of the right ventricle
how this is a classic case
of the syndrome owned by me
W.P.W
Wolff-Parkinson-White
it seems the heart has developed another junction box
that sends a pulse via an alternative route ,
sometimes in sync
but more often not
‘which Is why I experience this jiggling spider inside me
I hope the cure does not involve swallowing a bird!
He works through the whys and wheres
and then gets to the how
I will undergo a procedure
including a mild anasthesia
I can take my I-pod if I care
but he will guide a micro fibre
through my veins
to that place where
the problem seems to emanate from
and he’ll send a pulse to asses how strong
or weak the problem is
if it’s bad he’ll kill a muscle and the problem will be solved
if not he’ll leave it

I talk about the elephants
he says he’ll ‘have a look’
at the arteries while he’s in there.
I am quite assured of the procedure
though he does mention
‘someone with a sever case
died on the table
but they bought him back to life
:’with the paddles”
hmmmm
am I ready for that?
we set up appointments
and I pay his fees and go to Medicare
for reimbursements and in two weeks
I”l be on the table
If I last that long
these elephants are starting to hang around all day long
mildly worried
after speaking to my sister
about Angina
a narrowing of the arteries
but from what I read on the internet
this usually manifests when you play sport
so why do i have it now when doing nothing
this is more than hypertension
more than stress
there’s definitely something weird going on

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